Pacifiers

[Anci]

My daughter only uses her paci for bedtime and naps, but I see babies and kids with pacis all the time! It really frustrates me when I see a toddler trying to talk while a paci is hanging from his/her mouth. Obviously, it's not there to soothe them!

What are your thoughts on pacifiers? Do you use them? Under what circumstances?

[Shauna]

I only use one for bedtime and nap time. I am actually trying to wean my daughter off of hers but it's hard. She is nine months. I don't agree with them having it after a year old they are old enough to soothe themselves or with parents help.

[Anci]

I never once thought this discussion to be controversial. And I never said it was bad parenting either, please don't put words in my mouth. Maybe I should've used another word instead of frustrating, but I never said I considered it bad parenting, especially since I said my daughter is using one. I don't think that asking ''What are your thoughts on pacifiers? is controversial, or that it shows any anger...Anger for what???So let's not start any drama here...

[Anci]

hey, it's a forum where people are supposed to have discussions...if I can't voice my opinion in here, then what's this forum good for?I am not here to start controversies or drama...I just started a normal discussion, asking a simple question...we don't have to agree with each other, but that doesn't mean we cannot debate on a subject...but oh well...I won't stress anymore about it...

[Stephanie]

sorry... definitely didn't mean to put words in your mouth. the point of my post was actually to avoid drama .. I am really quite drama-less =). The pacifier thing is a really good discussion. I guess I just meant to say that I think people could feel defensive about the first part there even though it wasn't intended. You obviously have no judgmental feelings about the issue from your responses... didn't mean do cause any hard feelings! Sorry about that =)

[Stephanie]

I deleted my original post... i don't want to start a heated dabate here. My opinions on pacifiers are that kids aren't going to be using them when they go to school... so whenever they stop they stop, and I have no opinion about other people's children using them.

[Anci]

I am glad we sorted that out :)

[Anci]

Each parent will approach raising their child differently, each of us doing our best with our knowledge combined with the needs of the child we were blessed with the responsibility to care for.
I completely agree with that.

It's really hard not to generalize this situation.

I am sure that some toddlers do genuinely use their pacifiers as a means of soothing. I think that's OK. Some kids have more anxiety than others, and may need the sucking to help calm them. It's not any different than thumb-sucking, the kid is just using a piece of silicone instead of a thumb!! That being said,I also think that at that age your child no longer needs it and should find other ways to soothe themselves. Pacifiers are just bad habits that will be harder to break the older they are.
And again, that's just my opinion and I am not trying to say anything other than that.

[Camille]

My son is 2 and uses a pacifier for bed time and naps. I don't think there is anything wrong with them. I had a pacifier as a child until about 4. My mother says she never stressed about it and eventually I just gave them up.

[Jason]

My two year old is high strung and is still using a paci. She spits it out when I ask her to, and is becoming less dependent on it for soothing. I've begun asking her (for the last couple of months) to hand it over when she's trying to talk, when she's out with me at the grocery store, or when she's at a playground. Right now it's something she needs less and less often, but she still needs it sometimes. She'll give it up soon enough.

My only concern is the one you mentioned about talking: I do think she gets used to slurring her words around a paci, which is why I've taken steps to stop it. But to take it away from her permanently, knowing her like I do, would be cruel. Her older sister (and her younger brother for that matter) had no such taste for the paci and could leave it whenever, and did. Kids are different, and as a parent I try to give them what they need and balance that with what is best for them. I think my wife and I are striking the best balance possible for this particular little girl.

[Sadie]

My 10 month old baby uses them to fall asleep for naps when he is being cared for by our babysitter. And sometimes he uses them when falling asleep in the car. But he is needing them less and less. In the beginning I was steadfast against using them, but when I realized it might help comfort him, I caved. I figured it was what he needed, since I wasn't going to be able to let him be attached to my nipple all the time. And then I thought I would have a solid deadline for him to quit using them. But since he is getting less attached to them and not more, I figure it is ok to just follow his lead.

[Jennifer]

I was worried about weaning my daughter from her paci. I didn't want to use one, but from the start, she always wanted to suck on something. It really was soothing for her, so it was soothing for me. When she was about 10 months, we went away and lost the paci we brought with us. She didn't miss it. Great, I thought. No fighting with her when it is time to move on. Unfortunately, she now sucks her thumb. I'm not sure I came out ahead here! She definately does it for comfort when she is tired or around someone new. And so far, she has never tried to talk with her thumb in her mouth.

[SAEBausch]

We were going to try to be anti pacifier but sometimes the kiddo just needs to suck on something...and I just couldn't be that thing all the time. Hes almost three months now and finding his thumb more interesting. At this point he uses one when he needs it but absolutely wont take it when he doesn't want it so I cant imagine him keeping it forever.