Biting Commentary
I haven't posted about Michael's progress in day care. In the past month and a half things have gotten a lot better. Instead of clinging to me on the way in, he marches happily alongside me. He still cries when I drop him off, but it's mostly for show.
I have developed a pretty good relationship with the teachers. I know almost all of their names (which is really impressive for me) and I have good conversations with the morning teachers when I drop Michael off.
Over the last week a new challenge has developed. Biting. On Tuesday Michael bit a kid 3 times. Then on Friday it happened again.
First of all, it's a terrible feeling when you see the day care number pop up on your work phone. You know it's not something good. Nobody ever calls to say "Michael mastered a new skill!" It's either he's sick, he's peed up his clothes and doesn't have any extras, or like this week, he's bitten someone.
Second, I feel terrible that he's hurt another child. I'm totally out of control here. I wasn't there to see how it happened, I wasn't there to stop it and I wasn't there to make sure it doesn't happen again. So I really don't know how to make him stop.
I've seen Michael go after a kid before. In his old daycare, he and another little boy were good buddies, but also fought a lot. Typically one or the other would snatch a toy and that would set it off. At a birthday party, little D commandeered a riding toy from Michael, who took after him with fists and teeth of fury. He was pissed off! But that hadn't happened in a long time.
In the first biting incident, I believe there was provocation. In the second instance, according to the teachers there was not. Which is even more disturbing. What was going on in his mind?
I've ordered a book called "Teeth Are Not For Biting" and I have given him a pacifier to get used to. Perhaps if he brings that to school to chomp on, he'll refrain from chomping on his friends. Other than that, I can't do much else. He's too young to understand a lecture. And apparently you're not supposed to give too much attention to the act of biting because they might keep doing it to get a reaction. And Michael is definitely a fan of reactions.
It's funny how as parents we feel such a sense of shame over something we can't control. It's not like I've condoned biting or taught him how to properly chomp his friends. Yet I feel like his behavior reflects on me. Perhaps it's my fault he's a meany sometimes.
More likely he's tired and frustrated. Michael is a good sleeper. On the weekends he takes 3 or 4 hour naps. During the week he's up at 6:00 and gets a 2-hour nap at best. We pick him up at 5:30 or 6:00, feed him dinner shortly afterward and he goes to bed 7:30 or 8:00. So maybe it's still my fault that I work so far from home and can't pick him up sooner. No matter what, I'll still feel bad about it.
Hopefully next week will be better for both of us.
I have developed a pretty good relationship with the teachers. I know almost all of their names (which is really impressive for me) and I have good conversations with the morning teachers when I drop Michael off.
Over the last week a new challenge has developed. Biting. On Tuesday Michael bit a kid 3 times. Then on Friday it happened again.
First of all, it's a terrible feeling when you see the day care number pop up on your work phone. You know it's not something good. Nobody ever calls to say "Michael mastered a new skill!" It's either he's sick, he's peed up his clothes and doesn't have any extras, or like this week, he's bitten someone.
Second, I feel terrible that he's hurt another child. I'm totally out of control here. I wasn't there to see how it happened, I wasn't there to stop it and I wasn't there to make sure it doesn't happen again. So I really don't know how to make him stop.
I've seen Michael go after a kid before. In his old daycare, he and another little boy were good buddies, but also fought a lot. Typically one or the other would snatch a toy and that would set it off. At a birthday party, little D commandeered a riding toy from Michael, who took after him with fists and teeth of fury. He was pissed off! But that hadn't happened in a long time.
In the first biting incident, I believe there was provocation. In the second instance, according to the teachers there was not. Which is even more disturbing. What was going on in his mind?
I've ordered a book called "Teeth Are Not For Biting" and I have given him a pacifier to get used to. Perhaps if he brings that to school to chomp on, he'll refrain from chomping on his friends. Other than that, I can't do much else. He's too young to understand a lecture. And apparently you're not supposed to give too much attention to the act of biting because they might keep doing it to get a reaction. And Michael is definitely a fan of reactions.
It's funny how as parents we feel such a sense of shame over something we can't control. It's not like I've condoned biting or taught him how to properly chomp his friends. Yet I feel like his behavior reflects on me. Perhaps it's my fault he's a meany sometimes.
More likely he's tired and frustrated. Michael is a good sleeper. On the weekends he takes 3 or 4 hour naps. During the week he's up at 6:00 and gets a 2-hour nap at best. We pick him up at 5:30 or 6:00, feed him dinner shortly afterward and he goes to bed 7:30 or 8:00. So maybe it's still my fault that I work so far from home and can't pick him up sooner. No matter what, I'll still feel bad about it.
Hopefully next week will be better for both of us.
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